While I had a great time running/walking/crawling/singing with my Misfit Spartans at the NJ Super Spartan this past Saturday, I would like to spend a small moment of internet time to remember those that were lost during this event.
Hiatus From OCRs – I know it had only been a month-long hiatus, but to someone who typically pulls 2 events a month during the season, this was kind of crazy. I will not miss the hiatus. It was not fun and has left me way out of shape for the Super and the upcoming Beast.
Ability to Tie My Hair Up – Every stinkin’ muscle in my body hurts, thanks to Hiatus. Tying up my hair takes just about every ounce of energy contained in my biceps, tripceps, delts, traps, and those little intercostal muscles between my ribs. If the bun my hair currently is in falls, I’m just going to be stuck with funky, kinked up hair for the rest of the day.
Phone – I hated you, Droid Razr.
You were a piece of crap, but, goddammit, you were MY piece of crap. I dressed you nicely in your pretty pink OtterBox, yet you still insisted on committed cell-icide by jumping from hands to land screen first in the gravel parking lot by the registration tent. You are being missed greatly, even though I had every intention of trading you in for an iPhone the microsecond my upgrade was available.
Hunger Games Socks – I bought these socks specifically for this race. Not only did I get them because I love the Hunger Games (the book, not that P.O.S. movie) but also because they matched my new INKnBURN Phoenix Cami that I wore to signify my return to the mud. (Note: Check out my SunRype buddy Tam’s blog for a review of one of INKnBURN’s gorgeous new designs.)
The socks did not survive the race. I apparently have velociraptor claws for toes and they sliced right through the socks. They now live in a trash can by the showers. Or more likely in a giant dumpster, by now. They will be missed.
Cliff Jump and Monkey Bars – These obstacles did not show up at this Super, which was strange. The Cliff Jump isn’t exactly my bestest friend, but I can do it. And it was the highlight of a lot of people’s experiences last year, so it kinda sucks that it wasn’t there. The Monkey Bars can disappear all they want. All they mean to me is torn up hands and 30 burpees that I don’t really need more of. Those melonfarmers will not be missed.
Rob’s Insistence That He Can’t Do the Swimming Obstacle – So I know this guy named Rob. He’s a Misfit Spartan, now, but he wasn’t always. Before he ran with the Misfits he DNFd a Super and insisted that he couldn’t do the water obstacle. Well, those things got shattered to kingdom come. He started and finished this Super as a Misfit and we made for damn sure that he did that water obstacle. So, for the record, this guy named Rob did the Spartan Super on Saturday AND did the swimming obstacle.
Merch Bag – Oh, Merch Bag, I hardly knew you. I can’t really miss something I never really got to know, but I will definitely miss the money that was used to purchase your contents. You were filled with pretty cool t-shirts for myself and X, a foam Spartan Helmet, a bunch of patches, and, quite possibly, our camera.
Tough Cam – You have been through a lot, little camera, and you took it like a champion- Spartan Races, a Tough Mudder, GORUCK, MudManX, etc. You never complained or got gunked up with dirt in your battery compartment. Sure, you got a little mud on your lens, but that just made for cool photo effects.
May you rest in peace now. Unless, of course, some other Spartan picked you up and you get to live out some more races and bring someone else some joy.
Good bye random stuff. You made an exciting day even more interesting.
P.S. I’m hoping that Jay or I will be able to find the camera amidst our post-race chaos so that I can write up a race review with pics within the next few days. If not, I may have to go all Crappy Pictures up in here to write up something. Let’s hope the camera is found.