It is currently Day 10 of my Beachbody Ultimate Reset, which puts me in Phase 2 – Release. I have said good-bye to animal products…
…and hello to one of the funkiest flavors I’ve encountered. Ever. It comes in the form of the newest supplement that has been added to my daily routine along with all the same stuff from Phase 1. The Detox powder (which cleans your colon – ew) contains bentonite clay, chia seeds, turmeric, garlic, aloe vera, pau d’arco, una de gato (cat’s claw), and a plethora of other powdered barks and seeds. In other words: Dirt. You are supposed to dissolve this stuff in water and drink it back. There are problems with this:
- It doesn’t really dissolve. It forms an unstable brown/gray slurry that settles to the bottom if you don’t drink it fast enough, which will probably be the case because
- It smells like someone left their Olive Garden leftovers in the car. In July. In Kuwait. In 1992. It takes a lot of will power and nose holding to get up the nerve to actually drink it. Try not to take too long to swallow because
- It tastes like you went and ate that funky calamari that was sitting in the Humvee and are now heaving it back up. And since it never really dissolved properly in the first place, you are left with little grainy fragments in your mouth, just like after puking up a cheap Italian dinner. Have some water handy to rinse that away.
- Extra bonus: You get to do this 3 times a day! Whoopee!
There are some tips for getting it down: dissolve in a lot of water, dissolve in a teeny bit of water, add honey, add lemon, add cinnamon, dissolve in cranberry juice, mix with vegan Shakeology. None of these make it any easier as far as I am concerned. I’ve taken to just mixing it in 2 ounces of water and taking it like a Jäger shot.
On the upside, the food has been pretty good. Some of the portions are tiny and I am getting a bit saladed out, but I’ve also found foods that are surprisingly delicious. I will be adding some of them to my ‘normal’ food routine. The baked tempeh and the smokey tempeh are much more yummy than I’d thought they’d be. Zucchini and Cashew soup and Sweet Potato and Roasted Red Pepper Bisque are fabulous. Roasted yams, beets, and carrots? More please.
Wakame seaweed is so NOT yummy. It is seaweed. It is the slimy nasty stuff that manages to wrap itself around your leg when you go to the beach causing you to scream like a 4 year old girl. It is not food. I’ve also learned that, try as I might, I don’t like miso soup. This is unfortunate because it even shows up in breakfast on occasion. Blegh.
My only side effect so far has been low energy. I guess it’s ok though because this week the food prep is easier so I can relax a little bit more in the evenings. Most of the lunches are the same as the previous night’s dinner so we just have to double the recipes. Easy peasy. Also, breakfast is typically a big old bowl of mixed fruits. We made a giant vat of fruit salad and we just have to scoop out what we need. Same with the salad that accompanies lunch. I am hungry sometimes, but nothing that I can’t ignore until the next meal or snack.
I have been having some serious craving these last few days, though. Maybe I need to stop watching Cooking Channel.
- Five Guys burger
- Fried chicken
- Five Guys burger
- Beer battered onion rings
- French fries with ketchup like I used to get at the Saddle River town pool.
- Five Guys burger
But ignoring my cravings and following the nutrition guide and chugging back dirt is totally worth it because I am feeling good and I am losing weight. As of this morning, I have lost 6 pounds and Jay has lost over 10. (My accountability table only shows up to Monday morning’s measurements.)
|Measurments in Pounds||1/14/13||1/21/13||Total Losses|
|Measurments in Inches|
mmmm….. Five Guys burgers <drool>