No Vampires Allowed.

Dear Vampires,

Obviously you did not read the title of the post and are here accidentally.  I am going to give you a second chance at this. To continue  reading this blog may cause severe skin irritation and/or spontaneous combustion for people of the hemophagic persuasion.  It is highly advised that you leave this site right now.

Your friend,


As for the rest of my 2 or 3 warm-blooded, fully alive readers, the only thing you risk as a result of reading this is some really funky breath.

This weekend, Saugerties, NY hosted the 2010 Hudson Valley Garlic Festival.  This was my third year making the long trek up the New York State Thruway to enjoy garlic grown and prepared in every possible way imaginable (and some not so imaginable.) Local farmers, restaurants, and vendors offer up enough garlic and garlic-based wares to let Van Helsing, Blade, and the Lycans relax confortably in a vampire-free existance for all eternity.

Garlicky yumminess I have sampled:

Garlic Gelato

Deep Fried Garlic

Garlic Chowder

Garlic Shots (lemon juice, sugar, and minced garlic)

Garlic Cheddar

Garlic Cheese Curds

Garlic-marinated Pulled Pork

Garlic Cannoli

Garlic Jelly

And about 20 different varieties of Garlic (German Red, German White, Ukrainian, Italian Purple Stripe, Carpathian, Spanish Roja, Danube Rose, Music…)

This year, I found a farm that I had not seen in previous years. It offered a brand new addiction for me: Maple Garlic Almonds.  A brilliant woman from Maple Hill Farm ( invented a blend of garlic and maple sugar to roast almonds in. She called it ‘Nutty Madness.’

Your newest addiction

not to be confused with Space Madness

‘Honey-Roasted’ will never cut it for me again.

In homage to these delicious little snacks, I turned a boring old almond biscotti into Maple Garlic Almond Biscotti.  They are crunchy and sweet and GARLICKY. They are probably not a good match for your morning cup of coffee.  They might go good with a nice spicy hot chocolate though.  I think they are perfect for when you are craving a sweet and savory snack but don’t want to do the overdone chocolate-dipped pretzel thing.  I feel like I do need to warn you (vampire or not) that these are REALLY GARLICKY.  Please use this recipe at your discretion and modify it to your own garlic needs.

Garlicky Maple Almond Biscotti

You will need:

5 cloves Garlic, minced (I used the Danube Rose variety- great initial bite but then mellows out quickly)

2 cups Bread Flour

1 tbsp Baking Soda

3 Eggs

2/3 cup Sugar

3 tbsp Maple Syrup

1 tsp Almond Extract

1 cup whole Almonds

Putting it together:

Preheat oven to 300F

Throw the minced garlic into the toaster oven for a few minutes to mellow the flavor- raw garlic can be a bit too much for some people.

Mix the flour and baking soda in a small bowl.

Whip  the eggs, sugar, maple syrup, and almond extract until the color has lightened considerably and the mixture is thickened.  5 minutes in an electric mixer on high speed did the trick- it should look a bit like vanilla pudding. Switch to low speed and add the flour mixture a little bit at a time until it is just incorporated.  Blend the almonds and the toasty garlic in to the dough by hand.

Form the dough into a long loaf on a parchment lined sheet pan (shoot for a 4″ or so width- mine ended up wider because I used a stubby sheet pan.) Bake for about an hour at 300F or until it is firm and approaching a golden brown.  Reduce the oven temp to 275F and allow the loaf to cool for 10 minutes before cutting it into 1/2 -3/4″ slices.  Go ahead and eat those little end pieces.  Lay the slices on another sheet pan and bake for another 25 minutes, flipping them over once. Transfer to a cooling rack.

I got about 20 biscotti out of this recipe.  If I stuck with the 4″ width I probably would have had over 2 dozen.

Enjoy the bizarre yummines!


3 thoughts on “No Vampires Allowed.

  1. I just wanted to say that I was lucky enough to be able to try one of Nicole’s garlic biscotti, and they were really, really good! Not something you’d normally think of, but if you like garlic, you will like these cookies for sure.

  2.! Seriously, my two favorite food items paired together. Maple syrup and garlic! I am going to try this. Thanks for the idea!

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